“When someone said count your blessings now, before they’re long gone..”
It’s something to fear losing loved ones and another to face that bitter reality.
Very few people know that I lost my paternal grandmother after a long and turbulent ICU stay, right here in Islamabad. Three weeks to the day, I feel like this post honors her memory in some microscopic way.
Days of hypersomnia, nights of insomnia.. I now have to face my fears. Viewing life no longer in the understandably naive way I once did, I see how all these relationships are tied together by such a thin string. Something that could shatter any given day, any given second.
The idea that in the very next moment, someone that we can’t fathom life without, could leave us.
I’ve always been terrified by the idea of death. By no longer seeing, talking to people that are the foundation of my being, my entire heart.
I’ve reaffirmed the idea that I would drop any and everything for those that I love, that’s been tried and tested.
I’ve also realized that there’s plenty that I’m not ready to handle as a person. Things I can’t face just yet. The aftermath of my grandmother’s passing. The condolences. The constant reminders. My own vulnerability.
But it’s true.. life and therefore, time teaches us lessons we couldn’t otherwise comprehend.
Please pray for my grandmother and our entire family. She was the cornerstone for my entire family, immediate and extended. Meant the absolute world to my father. A short prayer for our family to be blessed with patience (sabr) during this harrowing time.